It is only fair to extend this debate to the ladies :-)
When I asked if country men were more 'masculine' than city guys, I was more willing to listen to the opinions of ladies than men for obvious reasons.
Now it's the gentlemen's turn to sit back and do the appraising.
Ladies are still welcome to give their opinion, but I am going to give the men a higher priority here :-)
I think this post will be more difficult to write. Maybe because I am a woman myself and I therefore find it hard to be completely objective about women they way I know I can about men.
But I shall try my best.
And this time, the question is not 'who is more feminine' but 'what do you think of these two women'?
At the risk of displeasing women everywhere in my attempt to generalise, here goes:
*deep breath*
As I did for the men, assume both types of women described here are of the same level of attraction and a similar age, let's just say, mid twenties.
Both have at least a high school education and both are happy where they are in terms of locality.
Rural Maiden
This woman is likely to be traditional-minded in the sense that she wants to be married before long. She probably got baby-cravings since her mid-teens. Life would not make sense to her unless she is someone's daughter, wife and mother, in that order.
She may well have dated a few men, and would most likely have tried to get each and everyone of them to commit to her in the past.
She will feel a true failure if she is not only married but also a mother by age 30.
It is perhaps an untenable thought that she will be single forever like her 45-year old auntie who lives in the city.
She is perhaps more likely to be 'modest or a 'semi-modest', at least in dress and general behaviour, but not necessarily more 'moral'. Her small community dictates that whatever she does is under scrutiny whether she likes it or not.
However, more often than not, she likes the constraints put on her by her society.
Paradoxically she could also be amazingly free-spirited. She is more likely than her city counterpart to be free of a 'herd'. She may have one or two best friends, but that's it. She wouldn't be part of a thirty-strong coach-load of partying singles.
She doessn't have the time for that.
She may have a job that is practical and very much at the heart of the community she serves.
She is not folding her hands in her lap and doing nothing, that's for sure.
If she is not doing something that pays well, she is at least helping out, volunteering in something.
Because her community does not allow slackers.
The drawback to this woman is that she may be in danger of expecting "too much" of a man.
She may indeed bring lots to the table, but that means she also expects a lot.
She may or may not want a traditional man. The irony is that because she is traditional, she would be willing to go with the flow with the man she chooses, whether or not he is traditional-minded, like her.
But she may do best with someone exactly like her.
She is 'feminine'. Just as much as her brother 'Hillbilly' is intrinsically 'masculine', in some intangible, raw, 'natural' manner.
She doesn't know of any other way to be a woman.
At college, she was amused at how aggressive some of her classmates were.
She dismissed it as some sort of 'city' thing.
She wouldn't believe it if you explained to her that that is actually the reality of some women's lives.
Rural maiden has a lot of problems, but none of her problems include being a non-feminine woman.
She lives too close to Nature to deviate from her natural instincts.
Urban Lass
This woman who is city-born and bred is, like her male counterpart, slightly more complicated than Rural Maiden.
For a start she is more prone to be far removed from her family than Rural Maiden.
She may be living alone.
She may be a 'career gal' or not. But if she is, she is not necessarily a feminist.
She has to eat, right?
She has to live somewhere.
She may or may not be a rich Daddy's girl.
Urban Lass is exposed to more people in general than Rural Maiden. She may however be far removed from 'man-oasis' unlike Cityboy who is often surrounded by women.
Urban Lass is actually more likely than Rural Maiden to be surrounded by a herd of women, and despite being in the midst of many people, be severely short of 'suitable' men to pick from.
She is undoubtedly more 'busy' than Rural Maiden.
She has more work, more leisure activities and more pressures on her.
Such is urban life in general.
In addition, she may also create this illusion, intentionally or unintentionally, because 'the herd' creates a competitive streak in her.
Urban Lass is more likely to have been partnered up by a certain age than Rural Maiden, although not necessarily married before Rural Maiden.
Urban Lass has to be more savvy than Rural Maiden just to survive. In this sense, she is much more useful as a 'co-captain' for a marriage-minded man. However, this may count against her, because of the inevitable 'strong and independent' label she acquires unwittingly or otherwise. She may have many more 'life skills' than Rural Maiden, some of which may not be obvious to a man. She may be perfectly able to cook and clean but her decidedly 'party lifestyle' may give a different impression. Her budgeting skills may be hidden by the fact that she earns more than Rural Maiden.
Is Citygirl ever as feminine as Rural Maiden?
In my opinion, generally, yes. At least outwardly so. I am willing to bet perhaps even more so than Rural Maiden.
But there is something about city life that tampers with her a little.
Rural Maiden is not afflicted by this particular problem.
Urban Lass has many tools at her disposal to make her life truly exciting.
Those same tools can also ruin her life.
Like her brother Cityboy, she leads a complicated existence.
Who is more appealing to men?
Who is the better prospect for marriage in a man's eyes?
Who is likely to get married first?
Who is likely to stay married?
If you get the sense that these are all trick questions, you would be right :-)
But only in the sense that we all recognise that everyone is right. It is afterall, a question of preference.
If at all possible, please self-identify as city man/woman or rural man/woman when commenting so it would be possible to see what the trends are in terms of 'like begets like' and all that...
Again, I don't really know what I am talking about in this post. I have been both a citygirl and a rural maiden but at very different epoques in my life, so I am not a reliable 'control subject' for myself.
But I am fascinated by how much one's environment affects one's self-perception and that of others.
Enlighten me.
Pretty please.
