Sunday, January 26, 2014

Woman logic

The gentlemen who visit this blog have often declared that we women are not logical.
I happen to agree :-)

But I often find logic in funny places. Even (gasp) in women!
:-)

I know - my hamster thought it was 'logic'.
But at best, it was woman logic, which is not really logic as we know it...but some other beast dressed up as logic if you only saw it with the eye of faith.
Yes, I know.

Speaking of hamsters,
I was in the store the other day, trying to buy Deti's hamsterlator gadget. Delighted to spot that it contained the word 'Space', I thought I was entitled to some sort of discount...but the retailers would not hear of it. In response to my protestations, I was thrown out of the store by the burly security guards. Bruised and brazed, I tried to appeal  to the store manager...

My imagination is getting as bad as LFOD's in the last post...
But not in the same way, thankfully...

Dirty boys aside, I would like to examine 'woman logic'.

I have this disease, and I would like treatment, if not a cure :-)

It's time to poke fun at myself and my sisters.
We are big girls, we can take it.

If you gentlemen can find examples of how illogical women are to you, in your daily encounters with them, please log them here. I would be delighted to hear them. Indeed, I would be pleased if you can find examples of 'woman logic' on this very blog!
Honest, I would be happy to laugh at my 'woman logic' provided you yourself are more logical than me :-)

And, it would give us ladies a chance to see where we are going 'wrong'.

I get teased almost daily for my lack of logic in real life. Always by the same people :-) Sometimes, it is well deserved.  But there are times when I am genuinely surprised that I am deemed illogical.

But perhaps, it is a question of ignorance? Perhaps the examples you men provide will help me to see the light a little better?



I am going to take a slight detour...

I saw (for the first time ever!) the film 'The Nun's story' starring Audrey Hepburn.
I was awed by this film. Has anyone seen it?

The funniest part to me was this conversation between Sister Luke (Gabrielle van der Mal) and a native man in the Belgian Congo when she arrives as a young nun and nurse in the Belgian Congo in 1930 with a group of older nuns.

Man: So where are your husbands, you White Women?
Sr. Luke: What do you mean?
Man: You must have husbands, don't you?
Sr. Luke: Did you ask (Mother Superior) this question?
Man: Yes.
Sr. Luke: And what did she say?
Man: She said you are all married to the same man. But I don't believe her. It is wrong for a man to have many wives. You White people keep telling us that. I can understand the others not having a husband, but you, you are young and beautiful. You must have a husband!
Sr. Luke (smiling): Actually, I do have a husband. But he is in heaven.
Man: Oh, I am so sorry, Sister Luke. I am so sorry for your loss.

Hahahahahahahaha!

That alpha dude, Jesus. He has a lot to answer for :-)

The native man was being perfectly logical, no?
But Christianity is not particularly a logical religion in the cold light of day...

But still, we love it, don't we...
:-)

The nun's story is a very sad film. When in the very last scene, she is disrobing, taking off her 'wedding' ring, getting back into her old clothes, it must have felt like a divorce.
A catholic woman (a nun, no less! a bride of Christ!) divorcing that alpha dude, Jesus!
No cure for hypergamy.



The particular woman logic I want to examine briefly is this woman's logic.

On the surface of it, she is seriously dumb.

But I beg to differ.

This kind of 'brake' on someone's actions is exactly what we need in our modern world. Especially for women.
If we stop to think, just for one minute, that certain actions are permanent, much like death, we would be better off.

Too many of us do things because they feel good at the time. We don't stop to think about the long-term consequences. It doesn't matter how far in the process we have gone. Something, must be in place to take us back.

That something could be shame.
It could be fear of getting caught.
It could be our own innate self-discipline.
It could be the effort it takes to go through with it.
It could be the financial cost it takes to go through with it.
It could be 'fear of the unknown'.

Too many modern women are egged on with bravado to go through with something that could be disastrous. Like divorce. Like taking a man away from his children.

This woman used her 'woman logic', dumb as it may seem to many of us, to say to herself: Oh my God, this is forever. I must stop. And who are these people who encouraged me to go through with this when they knew it would kill my marriage forever? They must be stopped...

I accused 'Anonymous' in the last post of being rather rigid, when it comes to women and hugs.
Perhaps I (kettle) am guilty of calling pot black.

I am either deeply respectful of great women (Augustina who inspired the caritas post), or I am deeply turned off by others (JLB3's example in the same post).
No neutral for me :-)

This woman ticks the 'respect to you' box. Despite seeming incredibly stupid. I'll take stupid if she keeps her vows.

Deti's hamsterlator would find a different interpretation for this woman's thought processes. But I shall stick to my version for now. Unless someone logically knocks me off my high horse.
:-)

Basically, what I am saying is, not all 'woman's logic' is like that :-)
Anyone even hesitantly agree?

Or is my own 'woman logic' getting in the way?

Let's pick at 'women's logic' and see where it takes us.
Perhaps a lot of you men have a problem with how women think. Perhaps we women don't 'get' you, which is why we seem to do strange and illogical stuff.
Here's a chance to clear the air...




11 comments:

Bob Wallace said...

Women - feels. Men - brains. ;-)

Well, not exactly. About 10% of women are logical, and usually the easiest way to identify them is that they like men better than women.

Spacetraveller said...

Bob,

"About 10% of women are logical, and usually the easiest way to identify them is that they like men better than women."

Is this the absolute truth, Bob?
Because if it is, I would be VERY logical, LOL, but I know I ain't, so either something's off with your theory, or I am more logical than I think!
:-)

By the way, what's the link to your caritas post? Unless I am mistaken, you don't have a 'search' button at your blog?

Bob Wallace said...

Would you prefer working for a man or woman? Who do you trust more to do the right thing?

There is a search function, upper left.

Ladd MaccAodh said...

It's hard for me to even fault "woman logic" anymore because I've been in the Game so long. Their actions have started making too much sense.

Take, for instance, one of my ex-girlfriends. She hated her best friend, and her best friend hated her (this is when I learned the word "frenemy"). Both of them knew they were hated in turn, but they went to great lengths to pretend otherwise. They would constantly act sweet and supportive of each other while badmouthing and sabotaging one another in secret.

I finally asked my girlfriend about it, why she didn't just find new friends and stop hanging out with her frenemy, but...

"I can't do that, she won't like it!"
"Well, she didn't like when you bought that dress she wanted for yourself first."
"That's different!"
"And you didn't like it when she slept with your ex."
"She's my best friend!"

Couldn't wrap my head around it.

Makes more sense now. They provided each other with a constant source of drama, and with a rival to jockey against for position while no one ever gained the upper hand. They were meeting each others' emotional needs; meanwhile I was projecting my own priorities on them (loyalty and respect, for example).

People start to seem a lot smarter and more rational once you start examining their actions through the lens of their own wants and needs. Now I just despair at some of the things people want and need.

RedPillSetMeFree said...

All too easy.

1) Women don't love *you,* they love *their idea of you.* And many women are miffed when a man doesn't conform to that; but no man ever can.
2) Miss "I didn't get that this was a divorce" just wanted to be sure she could collect the alimony but still be self-righteous in the eyes of the church. Benefits without responsibility, which is what women are the masters of.

Spacetraveller said...

Bob,

"Would you prefer working for a man or woman?"

Hm, tough one! In general, I do prefer to work with men, but in all honesty, I have worked with some brilliant women too. It depends on the man or the woman, I suppose, as well as the setting under which we are working.

But I do get your point about women and feelings, and men and brains. I think it is generally true, except in a few exceptions.

But what I don't really understand is why women who are more man-friendly are necessarily more logical. Is this nature or nurture? Are you saying that a woman who hangs around with men BECOMES more logical? Or is it that she is innately more logical anyway, which is precisely why she hangs around with men?
This sounds like an 'egg or chicken' question, doesn't it?
:-)

But I do get your point though, Bob.

Will check out your caritas post, thanks.

Spacetraveller said...

Anonymous Ladd MaccAodh,

Welcome to The Sanctuary! Are you of Scottish extraction?
:-)

Your example is very amusing, and yes, I understand exactly why your ex-gf and her friend behave this way. It makes sense to ME but I can see why it wouldn't, to men. I salute you for the conclusion you make about their behaviour - it is exactly right :-)

See, we women need to make 'connections', no matter how pointless they seem. This is our reason for being. None of it necessarily has to make sense! Whereas I think I have figured out that whatever you men do, it has to make sense to you.
Funny, isn't it?
:-)

Thanks for a brilliant example of 'woman logic'!

RedPillSetMeFree,

Welcome to you too!

"Women don't love *you,* they love *their idea of you.*"

Having been educated on the subject of 'love', I am now in a position to declare that what you describe sounds like 'Eros' love. (Please correct me if I am wrong, Bob!)
This certainly ain't 'Caritas'. What you describe is perhaps the most 'selfish' type of love, but I am afraid it is not unique to women (not that you said it was!).

About our 'dumb' woman, that was my first impression too, other than she was incredibly stupid not to realise that a divorce was permanent.

But I have to say, compared to the nun in 'The nun's story' (true story, by the way), I think she was by far the more noble. At the start of the trailer to 'The nun's story', the Mother Superior and the priest are doing their best to get her to change her mind. Is there nothing we can do? Are you sure this is your final decision? Do you need more time to think about this? All to no avail. She walked out of that convent without so much as a backward glance. A nun!
I'll take stupid anyday, because at least she looked back and panicked at the idea of a permnanent dissolution of her marriage. That is a very useful trait in a woman who has been taken to the frivorce waters, no? She is there, but she is refusing to drink. That is the point. I am sure her initial reasons for divorce were as frivolous as they come. BUT, she stopped herself (alas, making herself look stupid). It takes a certain courage to go against the herd when there are so many incentives to 'go girl'.

But having said all that, I see where you are coming from. If you are right, then Miss. Stupid is actually not as dumb as she seems!
In which case she may be a very smooth operator to boot.

Andrew said...

I completely agree with Ladd MaccAodh, and have had the same experience: the more I learn about women, the more their actions make sense. In fact, I am getting to the point where I am convinced that women are perfectly logical; they just have completely different motivations and desires. When men call things "illogical," it is just a reflex response meaning "I don't see what you are trying to accomplish."

I think that women also value emotional "truth" more than logical "truth." If something feels right to a woman, that is all that matters - in the same way that a man only needs to understand why something is right in order to believe that it is right. These two mechanisms of knowing "truth" are sometimes in apparent conflict, because each has its own strengths and weaknesses. A man can often miss the forest for the trees, while a woman can often miss the trees for the forest. Because of this, I think women's feelings are better correlated with truth than men's. Men's thoughts tend to be very narrow and focused, while women's emotions are informed by a much broader range of inputs.

Anonymous said...

@Spacetraveller and others

There is physical evidence of different brain circuitry:

http://www.theguardian.com/science/2013/dec/02/men-women-brains-wired-differently

Ladd MaccAodh said...

@ SpaceTraveller

Born and raised in America, but of nearly-pure Scottish ancestry. And yes, we menfolk do need things to make sense to us. We're very good at figuring things out when we know the basics, but sometimes those basics elude us. In this case I think women enjoy it; the fun of confusing less-experienced males outweighs the benefit of being understood all the time.

Spacetraveller said...

Andrew,

Your comment is breathtakingly true, in my opinion!

But this is one of those things, that, I don't think I could persuade a man to believe if it came out of my own lips. So I am relieved to see that there are men who see it this way too, as I do.

Erm, how DO you know all this, by the way?
LOL. Are you sure you are only in your 20s? You know far too much about women! :-)

Anonymous,

Thanks for that link!
I think the first time I clocked onto the fact that men and women are so very different was the moment of my awakening :-)
I haven't looked back since.
EVERYTHING we do starts out as whether we are doing it from a male or a female point of view. It really is that simple!

Ladd MaccAodh,

:-)

I don't think women enjoy confounding men. We are just as confused about you lot as you are about us!
Hopefully, we can swap dirty secrets so we educate each other about the other party.

In other news, the Scots want to separate from the English and Welsh!
Imagine - a united Kingdom no more!!!