Sunday, October 12, 2014

All women are natural born liars!

Thus spake Mr. Hogan :-)

And he said it with a straight face :-)
Like he really believed it :-)

Cheeky bugger! as they say 'up norf' in England.


I don't think I have done 'back to back' film reviews before, so this is a first for The Sanctuary.

I first saw the film 'Two mules for Sister Sara' when I was a child, so of course all the lessons a-plenty within it were lost on me. I loved the music - not sure what instrument it is that keeps recurring, especially in the scenes involving the mules, but it is certainly comedic, at least it was, to 10 year old me.

Then I saw it again recently, and I was amazed at how much 'Natural Law' troof' it holds.

I mean, Clint Eastwood ain't bad looking :-)
He's got that whole John Wayne-ish thing going on, which would make any lady happy :-)

And, as we all know by now, 'happy-ness is the troof', don'tcha know!

Pharrell Williams knows... and he is right!

Erm, getting sidetracked....

The ultimate 'tension' of a specific nature (mentioning no names) is to be had when two 'unavailable' people of different sexes are thrown together in a vacuum with no means of escape.
This is a script for
1) disaster
2) hilarity

We kind of get both in this film.

Here we have the ultimate MGHOW (bar Jesus Christ) versus the ultimate Alpha Widow.

Yes, a nun is the ultimate alpha widow :-)

In a good way.

Except, in this film (spoiler alert!!!) this nun is not exactly as she seems :-)

But for the first half of the film, at least, we are led to believe she is of the 'pure and driven snow' variety. Which makes Mr. Hogan's attempts to test her boundaries all the more hilarious.

But it's not his fault. Alcohol is the third party in this 'love' triangle :-)

Throughout this film, one gets the impression that poor old Mr. Hogan is being 'sent up', meaning that there is a conspiracy against him of sorts.
All engineered by the innocent-looking Sister Sara.

This in itself is a poignant point: I get the impression, looking around me, that modern men are indeed being 'sent up' by the not-so-funny joke that is feminism. And the more resourceful of them react with exactly the same kind of 'Red Pill-ness' that Mr. Hogan displays.

And what a fountain of Red Pill-ness Mr Hogan is! :-)
This guy is a walking Manosphere blog :-)

Like most actors whose on-screen personas mimic 'alphadom' very well (off the top of my head - Jack Nicholson, John Wayne being very good examples), Clint Eastwood's natural personality oozes confidence.

The slow (never rushed) movements, the thoughtful facial expression (usually minus a smile), the willingness to take on dangerous tasks, the ease with which he seems to execute said tasks, the even-toned voice, the logic of his words...
The list is indeed endless, but you get the picture...

I often wonder what's going through the casting director's mind when he/she picks these actors for these roles. I wonder if they already have a certain personality in mind, or are they stunned into selecting these guys when they show up at the audition? How does this process work? Any casting directors out there?

The film begins when Hogan happens upon what seems to be a rape scene about to unfold. Three drunken men are circling a semi-naked woman, taunting her.

Hogan intervenes, and ends up shooting all three men dead.

To his surprise, the female victim turns out to be a ..... nun.

At first he is simply shocked. They are afterall in the middle of a desert in Mexico.
What's a nun doing here of all places? he asks.

But Hogan doesn't get all 'white-knighty' on her. He is chivalrous but not supplicating, even with her 'nun' status. He protects her, but tells her off when she does something silly, like using their precious drinking water to bless the bodies of her dead assailants. He also refuses to do certain things for her, for example, burying the bodies of her assailants.

'Sister, I don't mind  shooting 'em for ya, but I'll be damned if I'm gonna sweat over 'em for ya'.

Sister Sara is determined to give the men a Christian burial. So she gets busy with the shovel that Hogan provides.

He teases her by suggesting that if she ever got tired of being a nun, there was always gravedigging in her future.
Hey, is it not a sin to neg a nun?

And when she accuses him of being 'as stubborn as her mule', his reply? 'Of course!'

Poor old Hogan can't seem to shake off Sister Sara. Each time he wants to go his own way (heh) something happens and she needs his help/protection.
See what I mean by my conspiration theory?

Hogan is attracted to her. But he is a little annoyed that she is married to God :-) And that she is as pretty as she is (distracting, you see).

Sister Sara seems to take his lust in her stride. She understands his lustful nature. She will pray for his soul.
She humours him by sharing some of her own struggles against temptation. Hogan is unimpressed. She must be lying about her chastity. Hence the title of this post.


Some of his funniest quotes listed here:

Can nuns cook?

Everybody's got the right to be a sucker once.

Oh that was no miracle, just an accident, life is full of 'em (in response to her thanking him for coming just in time to save her from her assailants).

Oh I don't know, never spent the night with one before (in response to 'you think nuns don't laugh?')

I ride from sun-up to sun-down. You either keep up or you don't.

What for? (in response to the question: 'don't you want a woman of your own?')

And what about you Ma'am? Haven't you wanted to be a whole woman, have a man make love to you, have children?

What do you do about those feelings that God gave every woman, including you?

In your case, Sister, just how much praying does that take? (in response to her assertion that when she gets 'those feelings', she prays, and they pass).

All the women I ever met were natural born liars, but I never knew about nuns till now.

I'll say one thing, Sister. I sure would have liked to have met up with you before you took to them clothes and them vows (looking her up and down in a salacious manner).

Look I told you not to 'brother' me!

Alright, it's a small shrine, let's make it a small prayer.

Hogan and Sister Sara embark on a mission together.
At the end of the mission he discovers something about her that surprised even him :-)

To say anymore about this film would be to spoil it for you.

Watch it, you would enjoy it, I am sure!