Monday, April 2, 2012

Pope Game

Awww, I LOVE Pope Benedict!

Erm, is it inappropriate to declare this in public??
Is this my irreverent Brit side coming out?

I think if God is the ultimate Game practitioner then Pope Benedict is his ultimate wingman.

Our very own Pope Ben.
AKA Joseph Ratzinger Jr.
I think he's so cute. Just like Danny's Paw-paw.

It's getting to that time in the Church's calendar when we will be seeing more and more of Pope Benedict. Recently back from Cuba and Mexico, he will be leading us into Holy week beginning on Palm/Passion Sunday.

Like most people of my generation, Pope John Paul II is the only other Pope I have known in my lifetime. He was the longest serving (modern) Pope.
He so happens to have been a very likeable character. Young and old easily identified with him. Wherever he went, he was an instant star. He had something that even Pope Ben doesn't have. I can't give it a name. Perhaps the thing that comes closest is charisma?
Yes he came under a lot of criticism for the whole abuse thing. I am not sure of the ins and outs of these, but I suspect all popes had/have this cross to bear on behalf of their more deviant subordinates, aka predatory priests.

Pope Ben is more 'quiet' than Pope John Paul II, in my humble estimation. He was an academic, an intellectual. Not really at home 'on stage'. But he does his best. He has to, because he is 'on stage' whether he likes it or not.

My hypergamy is not limited to the SMP/MMP.
I grew up with priests.
Ordinary priests.
The ultimate priest is the Pope.
Let's just say I am hopelessly susceptible to 'Pope Game'.
If the Pope in question is tall, handsome, famous (everyone knows the Pope, right?), earns more than me (not difficult - the Catholic Church is arguably the richest empire in the world), speaks several languages, travels a lot, has a fancy house (St. Peter's in Rome is not a pauper's abode), has a fancy car (the Popemobile has got to be the coolest car in the world - even if its top speed is 5 km/hour LOL) and is Catholic (um, the Pope is Catholic, right?), he's got my attention :-)
Except...he's taken.
By God.
(The ultimate pre-selection :-)
Zut alors.

Most Popes are usually really old by the time they start their popedom, but I am sure if one did a poll on young women (Catholic or otherwise), one would find that there are at least some who have major 'crushes' on them. Religious hypergamy at its very best :-)
Or maybe I just need help.

Has anyone been in the tower at the Vatican? I have, twice in the last 3 years. The second time, I and all the other lucky tourists spotted Pope Ben taking a stroll in his magnificent gardens during his daily evening Rosary time.
Considering my 'feelings', I kinda felt like a stalker. Aherm, this can't be good :-)

Every Pope has a team of ceremonial 'guards' of young men who 'guard' them. They are known as the Pontifical Swiss Guards.
Catholic boys in Switzerland have the option of doing this instead of the usual National Service (which is obligatory for all boys in Switzerland, bar a medical reason).

I love their uniform:

If I have a son who comes of age in Pope Benedict's lifetime, he is getting conscripted into this army. No questions asked. Nevermind that I am not in fact Swiss. I might have to beg, borrow or steal a swiss passport for him.

Pope Benedict was born in 1927. At 78, he became one of the oldest Popes in history. Apparently he attempted to 'retire' from the priesthood three times by the time he was 75, due to health reasons (stroke) and the desire to return to his academic lifestyle and write books. But he was denied three times. To add insult to injury, they elected him Pope three years later :-)

I am not sure how widely known the following story is, but it is indeed true.
His father Joseph Ratzinger  Sr. was a police officer who apparently wasn't getting too much luck with the ladies. (What's new, eh boys?)

To help his situation, he put an ad in the local paper specifying that he needed a wife who could cook and clean. Only one woman answered.
So not too many takers for poor ole Ratzinger then. I can't really explain this. Perhaps he wasn't an attractive prospect? But why not? As a police officer he would have been a very good prospect in any generation, no?
Or is it that 'personal ads' in the paper were frowned upon in the 1920's?

Anyway, that woman was Maria Peintner. She got the job :-)

Pope Benedict was the youngest of their three children.
Big brother Georg is also a priest. Big sister Maria never married and managed Pope Benedict's household until her death in 1991. In this manner she fulfilled the role I describe here.

So, Papa and Mama Ratzinger produced two priests and a virtual nun.

I don't know how long we will have our Pope Ben for. He himself has (worryingly) predicted a short reign as Pope due to his health problems. I hope he is wrong.
After seven years he is fast filling the big shoes left behind by John Paul II.
That is no mean feat.
John Paul II was a hard act to follow.

Seven years ago to the day, I, like millions all over the world, was pacing up and down and biting my nails anxiously as I waited for the white smoke to come out of the chimney of the Sistine Chapel and to hear the words 'Habemus Papam!'
And then, all I wanted to know was, who was going to be our new Pope?
Would I like him?
Would he be as cool as JP II?
Would he lead The Church well?
I needn't have worried.
The rest, as they say, is history.

Unlike in the secular world where we all vote for who we want as the leader of our respective countries, (except of course those unlucky enough to live under a dictatorship), a new Pope is always a 'surprise' :-)
Sometimes a nice surprise, as in the case of Pope Ben, sometimes a not-so-nice surprise - not mentioning any names :-)
So I pray and hope that Pope Benedict will be with us for a long long time.

I always wanted to be a one-Pope girl.
But failing that, I would be happy with 'two-Pope' girl.
Hey, just trying to keep the number low :-)
And I hope Pope Ben obliges me by staying alive.

Indeed he is blessed.
Viva il Papa!

 Aww, crying for his predecessor JP II.
See? He is not just 'alpha'. He's got a sensitive side too :-)

Dominus vobiscum!

Happy Easter to all.


Anacaona said...

You are freaking insane.
I like you!
Sadly I disagree with your love for Benedict I call him the Pope Palpatine, he looks like the bad guy in Star Wars prequels, unfortunate accident.

Grasshopper said...

Speaking of popes and one’s irreverent side coming out you know here in the US we have running for President this year someone named Ron Paul whom I have taken to calling “The Pope” Ron Paul – has a nice ring to it don't you think?


Spacetraveller said...

@ Anacaona,

"You are freaking insane."
Not the first time I am hearing this, haha. Probably not the last time either.

Say, Anacaona, as a Catholic girl, did you never have a 'crush' on a Pope? Fair enough, Pope Ben is not exactly every girl's cup of tea, but JP2 surely?
I mean, the guy was the equivalent of a Catholic George Clooney, no?
Full of a certain je ne sais quoi that I notice is quite possibly unique to Slavic/Polish men...

Anyway, I digress :-)

On a related note, I just noticed that Pope Ben's parents were Joseph and Maria!
Hmm, anyone know a Joseph/Mary couple?
They are bound to produce some seriously holy kids, right?

@ Grasshopper,
Yes, I see what you mean. Ron Paul has this Pope-like air about him...
He looks like John Paul I or Pius XII!

Lost said...

Shouldn't you be persecuted or something? a Catholic Brit that loves the Pope... you moved away from GB seeking refugee status didnt you?

Spacetraveller said...

@ Lost,

Hahaha, my mugshot is all over GB, yes, as a wanted person :-)

Anonymous said...

Totally adorable. I just love Papa Benny as well, cute little German grandpa that he is.

As for Swiss Guards, I once knew a girl who dated one. Swoon!

- flirtyintrovert

Spacetraveller said...

Hello there, Flirty Introvert,

Any girl who confesses to a secret crush on any Pope gets a free pass to The Sanctuary!
So a special welcome to you :-)

Aw, don't get me started on the Swiss Guards. I know two (sadly way younger than me though!)

But yes, I swoon nonetheless :-)